Week 137 of Gibraltar Diary

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Sunday 24th October 2010

Gibraltar is a pretty honest place - this drill would not last five minutes in the UK.

Monday 25th October 2010

In Castillio de la Duquesa we wander around in the sunshine and then have a drink in a bar which has Frank Sinatra booming out. The drinks cost 11 euros which is less than Puerto Banus but still more than most places.

Tuesday 26th October 2010

In the evening we go to see the Riga New String Quartet, who are all very young and pretty. What is more, they are ultra professional and competent.

Even better, all of the bumbling non-entities who normally use such occasions to massage their own egos and bore the pants off the rest of us with their interminable speeches have been locked in the bathroom. Hurrah!

Wednesday 27th October 2010

Well, I guess we must have done something but quite what I have no idea.

Thursday 28th October 2010

We get to the Danz Extravaganza, which, when it finally starts 45 minutes late, is brilliant. Much of this time is spent looking at the back of somebody's head.

The participants must have spent hundreds of hours rehearsing but the organisation is a disgrace. Here are some tips:

1. Get to the theatre a couple of hours before the kick off so that when the curtain jams, you can un-jam it
2. Ditto the lights
3. Sell catalogues before people sit down, not after
4. Ditto raffle tickets
5. Get the mikes set up properly.
6. Shoot anybody who goes onto the stage and attempts to speak between acts.
7. Put an address, phone number or website on the programme so that people know where to send their kids if they want to dance.

Friday 29th October 2010

In the evening we go to see Red which is enormous fun. Yet another of the new comic book films like Sin City. Brilliant.

Saturday 30th October 2010

We have a snack in Cafe Solo which at least serves real Coke with their drinks, unlike The Little Rock, which uses a post mix dispenser. So, you save about 10p for each order of Coke but you lose pounds because people like us take their custom elsewhere. Pooh bah humbug.

Back to the cinema to see Despicable Me which is another brilliant film aimed at kids but catering ffor adults too. Who would expect to have vectors defined in a kids film "a quantity, such as velocity, completely specified by a magnitude and a direction". And a mention of Lehman Brothers too, the lamented ex-bank.

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      End of Week 137 of Gibraltar Diary

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