Week 28 of Gibraltar Diary

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Sunday 21st September 2008


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Whoever invented alcohol and digital cameras has a lot to answer for. Finally we leave at 2.00am but our hostess is so disappointed that she runs down the street to persuade us to stay. Which is very flattering. But as I express to my girlfriend "better to depart when they are sad to see you go than when they are relieved".

Monday 22nd September 2008

Later on we go for a trip round Gibraltar in the brilliant sunshine. Wherever we look, constructon work is going on - part of the property boom that permeated every area of Europe and probably the world for all I know. Who is going to buy all these apartments? We might manage one but that still leaves a lot to go at ...

Tuesday 23rd September 2008

The wind is blowing hard as some dinghy sailors find out in the bay.

Late at night we go to look at a beautiful apartment from the outside to see what the area is like when it is dark. There is virtually no traffic but as soon as I park a huge white dustcart careers towards us flashing its lights and blowing it's horn while the driver yells something incomprehensible out of the window. Possibly, "nice car, well parked" but I think not.

After twenty minutes or so we drive off but as the road is clearly going nowhere, I do a rapid U-turn whereupon the ghostly white dustcart hurtles right on top of us again out of nowhere, flashing its lights and blowing its horn. What is a dustcart doing hurtling round the streets of Gibraltar at midnight? Clearly, this is a paranormal experience. Maybe a reincarnation of Moby Dick come back for my other leg? Or perhaps the truck from Steven Spielberg's Duel made real?

Either way it is a clear warning not to buy the Apartment as the area is haunted by the ghost of a giant dustcart that patrols the streets looking for innocent victims to terrify. Nice view though.

Later, I realise that the dustcart could well have been on it's way to the main Gibraltar rubbish tip which is just up the road. Why didn't the agent mention that? Perhaps he forgot.

Wednesday 24th September 2008

My girlfriend has decided that we need a cocktail shaker. Quite why, I'm not sure, since neither of us know anything about cocktails apart from what we have seen in the Bond films ("a dry Martini, shaken not stirred"). Come to think of it, she has also bought a bottle of Martini from Morrisons. Would James Bond buy his Martini from Morrisons? Probably not.

Eventually she finds one in "We Sell Everything" for 2.80 who, for once, live up to their name.

Thursday 25th September 2008

We go to check out the location of the rubbish tip and find that it is tucked away right at the end of the peninsula. On the way back we pass yet another development perched high up on the edge of a cliff.

Friday 26th September 2008

We have a few people round to watch Om Shanti Om but even before we start our giant bottle of Bacardi, bought two weeks ago in Andorra, is showing serious signs of wear. Maybe it is evaporation?

After three or four hours the evaporation has reached alarming proportions and we may have to make a trip to Morrisons.

Saturday 27th September 2008


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We finally shovel people out of the door at 2.00am which is always a sign that everybody had a good time.

Later, there is the most incredible thunder storm - at one point the flash and the bang are simultaneous and absolutely deafening (even for somebody who is already deaf). This is something few people ever experience without being actually struck. I assume that the lightning has hit one of the maintenance towers which are STILL there while they await some glass from Denmark (don't ask). My girlfriend sleeps through all this without a murmur.

We get up late, clear up and then get ready to flee the country via Malaga airport. On the way we drop off a few perishable items at Katey's place where we all have an opportunity to admire her beautifully straightened teeth.


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